


New Beginnings, Old friends

by My_floaty_coaty_boy



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Break Up, Coming Out, Fluff, Getting Back Together, M/M, Trans Castiel (Supernatural), Trans Character, Trans Male Character, briefly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-06
Updated: 2018-09-06
Packaged: 2019-07-07 20:39:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15915822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/My_floaty_coaty_boy/pseuds/My_floaty_coaty_boy
Summary: Castiel has made this journey before. But not like this.He misses his boyfriend--ex boyfriend, Dean. But he did what he had to, now he can start again.But that doesn't mean letting go of everything.





	New Beginnings, Old friends

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little one shot that i write during Bake-off. NBD. I'm not JK rowling or CW or whoever owns either of these fandoms

Castiel looked up at the grimy bricks of the station outer wall, catching his breath as it began to speed up. This shouldn’t be so hard; it was his sixth year, he’d done this before, he knew his way around the twisting, moving staircases and the forgotten, secret rooms. He'd made this journey to completion five times both forward and back, and before then he'd come to the station with his siblings his entire life; he _knew this_.

He knew this, he'd _done_ this.

Then again, he'd never done it like this.

He squeezed the handles of his luggage cart, old but sturdy, wishing he could absorb some of its strength. At the front of the cart, in her carrier, Meg purred loudly as if sensing his dread and attempting to calm him. He appreciated the effort, but it didn't really do much to settle the snakes in his gut.

He startled when a hand hit his shoulder, but smiled nervously at his brother when Gabriel grinned at him, subtly pushing him inside, through the widest of the busy ticket gates and towards platform nine. Behind them, Castiel knew that Anna and Samandriel were following, each with their own luggage carts.

“So, Cassie, you ready? You know, I’ve heard the Hufflepuff boy’s dorm _stinks_ , ‘cause none of them remember to finish the food they steal from the kitchens, then they find it in two months growing mold. Ready for that?”

Castiel rolled his eyes, grinning despite himself. “Please, you think it’s any worse than Luc’s room?”

Gabriel cackled, and Castiel scoffed and shook his head as they turned the corner onto the platform. The four of them waited near the wall between nine and ten, watching for a lull in the hordes of muggle londoners passing by.

Anna took the plunge first, speeding towards the wall and disappearing through the bricks leaving nothing but a trail of dust in her wake. Better than last year, when she'd panicked so much she nearly got stuck between Kings Cross and Nine and three quarters. Samandriel went next; it was his first year and none of them wanted to leave him alone on either side of the gateway. He copied his sister and made it through the wall without incident. Castiel went next, and he couldn't help but feel calmer when the darkness gave way and  he saw the gleaming redbrick of the station, the bright red train sat majestically on it's tracks, the hundreds of people, still in muggle clothes, bustling around.

Smoke billowed in tons from the train’s funnel, the thestral-black charcoal joining the previous years of stains on the ceiling. The station was full of Castiel’s fellow students and their fussing parents, and for a moment, he was completely tranquil, despite the havoc. A fierce sense of belonging flooded him, and he smiled slightly. Then Gabriel pushed him out the way, leading them to the luggage cart and helping them load their suitcases onto the train.

Castiel was sliding his yellow wheelie case next to his siblings’ when he heard the voice: It was one he has grown to know well over the past few years, its possessor had gone from classmate to best friend almost instantly. Then, halfway through their fourth year, they’d taken another step:

The Yule Ball had brought with it dozens of shy romances, and Cas and Dean had been no different. Dean had asked first, but it was Cas who had kissed Dean when the Gryffindor boy had brought him back to the Hufflepuff common room entrance.

They'd been together for the rest of fourth year, and all of fifth. Until two weeks before the summer began. Castiel still remembered the betrayal on Dean's face, the heartbreak as Castiel told him they couldn’t be together. It was worse than the yelling; Dean could and would yell at anything that he deemed deserving, although he'd been working on managing it better. But to Dean, yelling made sense. It was a nonviolent outlet that he could hide behind. But those few seconds where Dean's brain caught up with Cas’ words, where his face showed his true feelings, his vulnerability, they were the worst of Castiel’s life, until that point. Seeing the hurt he'd caused tore him apart.

But it had to have been done.

Castiel saw him first.

Dean looked taller, broader. He'd had a growth spurt over the summer, and now he was noticeably taller than Cas, as opposed to the inch Castiel had on him last time they'd seen each other. His hair had been trimmed shorter, but his eyes were still the same mesmerising green. His smile was broad, and Castiel missed the days where it was aimed at him.

And there was Sam! The kid brother, sorted into Ravenclaw the year before, the boy Dean claimed was a serious annoyance, but would do anything for. His hair was darker, and longer, and he was almost as tall as Castiel. They had been good friends before the summer, before the breakup, and Castiel had missed Sam’s seemingly endless impatient but kind hearted advice.

Cas tore his eyes away from them and stepped into the passenger part of the train, searching for an empty compartment.

Anna spoke quietly, having caught her brothers wistful staring. “You know Cassie, if you just told him, he'd listen. He still cares.”

Castiel shrugged her off and tugged open the door to a blessedly unoccupied compartment. “Anna, we haven't spoken in two months. The last contact we had was the letter he sent.”

“You mean the letter you burned? The one you didn’t even read?” Anna raised her eyebrow pointedly.

Castiel murmured, “Anna, if I told him, he would have done what I did. I had to do it first.” Then  he stared out of the window as his siblings settled into the carriage, settling into a comfortable, zoned-out peace.

The train had just pulled out if the station when Gabriel stood. “Come on, Sam, we're gonna find the candy lady. I want a pumpkin pastie.” Gabriel shut the compartment door behind them, leaving Castiel and Anna on their own. If Anna felt like she had more to say, she kept quiet. Castiel continued to stare, though he wasn’t taking in any of the scenery outside. He was caught up in his thoughts; he knew this year would be different. He hoped for a good different.

After a few minutes of the silence, Anna stood suddenly. “I'm gonna go find Charlie. See you, Cas.”

He hummed, barely hearing her. She slid the door open but was prevented from leaving by the one voice Castiel didn’t want to hear. “Oh, hi, Anna.” Dean smiled tightly, with the appropriate amount of awkwardness with which one uses to address an ex's sibling.

Anna smiled smally. The two had been on good terms, until the a few months ago. Cas couldn't help but feel guilty. She gave a quiet greeting and pushed past him, letting Dean into the almost-empty compartment.

Dean looked up to greet him, the way one would a stranger, then did a double take, squinting mildly. “...Cassiel? I didn't...I didn't recognise you--you cut your hair, and...you look different.”

Castiel flinched and avoided Dean's inquisitive eyes. “It's Cas- _tee-_ el, now, Dean. Or just Cas.”

Dean’s brown furrowed, and he closed the door, leaving them alone. There was no sign of Sam. “I don’t...I don’t understand, Cas.”

“I’m trans, Dean. Transgender. I began my transition over the summer. I-I use he/him pronouns now and I’m sleeping in the boy’s dorm.”

Dean still looked confused, but after a moment, he nodded. “Sure, O-OK. How...When did you know?”

He knew the answer, of course he did, but Castiel gave it anyway. “The Hufflepuff girls staircase stopped letting me up there two weeks before summer. I slept in the common room.”

“Two weeks, huh? So...So this is why…”

“Yeah. I'm sorry, Dean, you know that, but you're straight. I can't be with you and be happy within myself. I hope we can be friends.”

“Why didn't you tell me?”

“I...I hadn't come out at school yet. I wanted to start my physical transition first, but--I didn't want you to tell people. I didn't want people to know yet.”

Dean sat down heavily opposite Castiel. “You think I’d do that? You think I _could_ do that?”

Castiel still wouldn’t meet Dean’s eyes. “...Truthfully, I...I don’t know. You told me your father was conservative. I didn’t know if…”

“You thought I could be the same? Cas, I...I’d never--”

“I know! I-I know, but...I was scared. Dean--you can be unpredictable. You make rash decisions; you act without thinking sometimes, and I...I couldn’t risk my ability to come out on my own terms.”

There was silence for a moment, and Castiel looked up finally. He didn’t know what he was expecting, but Dean’s soft smile wasn’t it. “Yeah. Yeah, I do do that sometimes, huh? I’m workin’ on it, Cas, I swear. But...That wasn’t why you ended this, was it? It was because you think I wouldn’t be interested in you as a guy.”

“Well--yeah. You’re straight, Dean, and I know I might not look like a boy totally yet, a-and you and the other people in our year...my house, too...they all see me as a girl, and I’ll have to work to change that, but--”

“Woah, woah, Cas, calm down. You know, I did my own thinking over the summer. A-and...I was so angry, so lonely, that I didn’t have you, your letters, _anything,_ I--I…” Dean cleared his throat awkwardly, and it was his turn to look away. “I...went on a date. We...we slept together. Aaron made me realise some things, but we didn’t really click. I think I was just trying to get over you.”

Castiel sniffed, and pretended it was allergies. “Well, I’m glad you and she had fun.”

Dean’s brow furrowed. “‘He’, Cas. Aaron’s a guy. I...I’m bisexual.”

Castiel’s eyes snapped up, and green met blue in a flash of hope. “Wh...What? ‘ _Aaron’?_ I thought you said ‘ _Erin_ ’! Dean--I didn’t know, I--”

Dean laughed. “Neither did I, until Aaron. Though, I suppose, you’re my first boyfriend, I just didn’t know it yet.”

“I...I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I’m sorry I ended things. I just...needed to think.”

Dean smiled softly. “I get that, Cas, I do. And I still have questions for you, because I want to understand, but...I love you, Castiel. In every form you take, I love you. And I’d be so grateful if...maybe we could pick up where we left off?”

Castiel’s smile was wide, and he threw his arms around Dean’s shoulders. “Yes! Yes, Dean, of course! I love you so much, I’m so sorry, thank you, I-I…”

Dean shushed him gently, stroking his back and burying his face in Castiel’s shoulder.

“Well well well, Dean-o. I assume this means you two have worked out your teenage angst.”

The two looked up at Gabriel, who was standing in the now open doorway, Samandriel peeking from behind him. Dean and Castiel slid apart, settling next to each other, hands still linked.

“We won’t have to deal with you being gross with our brother on this journey, will we? ‘Cause I really don’t wanna hafta find a new cart.”

Castiel was about to reply, but Dean spoke first. “We’ve lost a summer, Gabe, we need to make up for it.”

Gabriel rolled his eyes, but settled on the bench seat opposite them.

When the train pulled up in the station outside of Hogwarts, Dean and Castiel were still holding hands.

**Author's Note:**

> Comment, tell me what you think? I might write more hogwarts stuff? Please dont hate me for the houses I put them in! I can see them in almost any house! It just so happens that in this one I chose these!


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